


Hold me tight.

by moonchild556



Category: Doki Doki Literature Club! (Visual Novel)
Genre: Bullying, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:14:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24314098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonchild556/pseuds/moonchild556
Summary: Yuri has always been the schools outcast. A freak that doesn't fit in. However, when a classmate takes an interest in her, her self confidence starts to bloom.
Relationships: Protagonist/Yuri (Doki Doki Literature Club!)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 23





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter One. An average high school boy observes a far from average high school girl.

MC:  
At my school, it’s always better to fade into the background than to stand out. Fortunately, with my bland personality, fading in comes rather easily. Like most high schools, there is a strict social hierarchy, and avoiding the bottom is everyone's goal. While I’m definitely closer to the bottom, at least I’m not a total outcast. Not like that girl. The one with all the rumours about her. The one that spends her lunches alone in the library. The one that sits in the back of class, never speaking. The one all the boys mock. Maybe me, Sayori and Natsuki aren’t exactly the cool kids, but at least we aren’t her. 

Yuri:  
I wish they wouldn’t look at me. I wish they wouldn’t talk about me. I can see the stares when I’m in class. I can hear the whispers about me in the halls. “Freak” “Creepy” “What the hell is wrong with her?” I don’t fit in here. I have no friends. The girls at this school think I’m a monster, and are scared to get close to me. The boys make disgusting comments about my body. My only escape is hiding from it all. I have my hiding spots and safe places when it all is too much. The library, the club room where I’m too scared to speak to my fellow members but can lose myself in books, the bathroom if I close the stall door: my entire school day is spent hiding from people. 

Most of the time, I’m ok with being alone. As cruel as the taunts and the rumours are, I’m ok if I can retreat into my books. If things get really really bad, I know I have another escape at home. However, sometimes I get lonely. I see the girls talking to each other, and listen to how excited they sound, and how much fun they seem to be having. Sometimes I wish I could have something like that, but a freak like me will always be on my own. I wish I could open up to my club members, Sayori, Natsuki and Monika. I get the sense they want to know me better, but if they were to learn all about me, they’d be scared away and I would have no one. Hell, they are probably already creeped out, they are just too nice to say anything. I mean, all I do is sit in the back of the classroom and read horror novels, and write really angsty poems. I don’t think it’s normal to live like this, but I’m not a normal person.

MC:  
The girl's name is Yuri, I’ve been told. For some reason, I find her fascinating. The way she sits in the back of the class, her long purple hair covering her face, always looking slightly on the verge of tears. Despite the fact she was larger than the rest of the girls at school, in height and uhh boob size, she always reminded me of a small frightened animal, like a bunny rabbit staring down a much larger predator. And at our school, she had a lot of natural predators. 

Today in class I could hear whispering, the same old rumours that have surrounded her for the last four years. “Did ya hear she cuts herself?” “My friend had a gym class with her, she changes in the washroom so no one will see her scars.” I wonder if she hears these whispers. One time, last year, a group of girls confronted her about it and she burst into tears and ran out. We didn’t see her at school for another week. However, today Yuri looks focused. It’s English class, my least favourite class. I don’t care what some old dead guy wrote 200 years ago. If I was in charge of the class, we’d study real art like manga and video games. My dream english would have classes on Fire Emblem and Attack on Titan. I know Natsuki would actually pay attention if we did that. 

In contrast to my sleepiness, Yuri looks engrossed. She spent the whole class with an intense look of concentration on her face. It was kinda scary. We are learning about some old guy named Edgar Allen Poe. We were supposed to read a story called “The Cask of Amontillado” for homework but I didn’t feel like it. From what I can make out from half paying attention to the lecture, it’s about a guy who gets mad at his friend and seals him in a tomb. Very dark, very creepy. No wonder the weird purple haired girl likes it.

Sometimes I wonder why I’m so fascinated by her. It’s not like I like her. I mean, she could be pretty if she wasn’t so scary, but like, there are loads of cuties at the school. Compare her to Monika (the school's queen) and she’s pretty average. It’s not like I wanna be her friend either, my social reputation is already hurt hard enough by my association with the two freaks I sit with, the angry, obnoxious Natsuki and the constantly overexcited underachiever Sayori. Another loser to our gang would definitely make us the schools designated weird kids (like we aren’t already). Despite this, I still felt an urge to observe Yuri from afar. Perhaps, it was a morbid curiosity. 

Yuri:  
If I wanted them to think of me as less of a creep, I didn’t do a good job today. Despite the nasty comments I heard circulating around the class, I listened intently to the lecture. I loved everything about the story. I’ve always been drawn to dark, disturbing stories. There is something about horror that speaks to me in a way that no other genre does. I love the feeling of being disturbed and unsettled by a piece of literature. A good horror story has a way of working its way into your brain, and lodging itself there, making you reflect on it for days. God Yuri, when you think things like that no wonder the others think you're a creep. I wonder if I disturb my classmates the way a good book disturbs me. Maybe that’s why I have no friends.

MC:  
It was a normal lunch that day, I was arguing with Natsuki over manga as usual. For someone who spends so much time reading manga, she sure has garbage taste. For the thousandth time, she tried to defend Parfait Girls, and for the thousandth time, I told her I need more substance in my stories. Just as this annoying debate was reaching its peak and Natsuki was turning red with anger, Sayori ran over. “GUESSWHATGUESSWHATGUESSWHATGUESSWHATGUESSWHATGUESSWHATGUESSWHATGUESSWHATGUESSWHATGUESSWHAT” she screamed at us. “Holy shit calm down Sayori” Natsuki retorted. “SORRYIMJUSTSOEXCITED” she screamed back. 

Sayori had been my friend since we were kids, and after many years of this I learned to get used to her excitable nature. She was a normal looking girl, a bit chubby and a bit shorter than me, with short pinkish hair that she always had a childish bow in. Her main talents seemed to be napping and snacking, and her hobbies included screaming, telling bad jokes and playing nintendo games I grew out of when I was twelve. “You won’t believe it guys” she said “we got invited to a party at Monika’s Saturday!” “What the hell?” I said. How did she get us into a party with THE Monika, the school queen, a woman who’s smart, beautiful and talented in so many ways. I’m just shocked she even knew our name, we are so far apart we may as well be aliens compared to her. “How do you even know her?” I asked. Natsuki rolled her eyes as Sayori sighed “She’s in the literature club, ya know, the one I keep trying to get ya to join?” “Monika’s in that? I always thought it sounded boring, but now I’ll consider it.” “I’M IN IT TOO” said a very annoyed Natsuki. “Ok now I’m a lot less interested.”

Natsuki looked back, frustrated. The easily angered pink haired girl always seemed to have a scowl on her face, unless she was getting attention or reading manga. She could be kinda cute when she did smile, as rare as it was. Just never call her cute, you will never hear the end of that. “Monika is the leader and I’m her second in command” said Sayori excitedly (does Sayori say anything not excitedly?” “Who else in the club? Anyone I would know?” “It’s just us, Monika and Yuri”. I was taken aback when I heard the last name. “Y-Yuri? That weird girl? What is she like?” “Don’t call her weird! Yuri is a nice girl when you get to know her”. I was surprised to see Sayori defend her. “She’s very shy, but when she does speak she has a big heart” she continued. “Yuri’s cool, shame her poems are such pretentious garbage.” I guess Natsuki has an opinion on her too. Like Yuri, Natsuki is a victim of rumours and bullying at our school. She is smaller than everyone else her age, and sometimes comes to school with unexplained bruises, which have led to wild speculation. However, they handle this very differently. While Yuri retreats inside herself and hides, Natsuki has built up an angry persona to protect herself. Just sometimes I feel she works so hard on her aggressive image she’s afraid to let anyone see the real her. “Monika invited Yuri as well, but I doubt she’s gonna be there” Sayori said. “No surprises, that girl will never come out of her shell” Natsuki said. Perhaps Natsuki had the same problem. The lunch bell rang, I had to go off to class “See ya guys at the party tonight” I said. “Can’t wait!” Sayori yelled back.

Yuri:  
I went to the computer lab for the last class of the day. The final class on a Friday afternoon was a blessing and curse. The good side was that I’d be free, just go to literature club after school and then I have the weekend off to be left alone with my books. I don’t hate literature club. I may be too scared to speak in it, but I do not hate it. It’s a nice place to read, and being around nice girls makes me feel a bit better about myself. They seem to like me. If they knew the real me, they’d treat me like everyone else, but for now they seem to like me. The bad side is that every asshole at my class was super excited for the weekend as well, and the teacher basically stopped trying to control them. So if the sociopaths that made up my classmates turned their attention to me, they have free reign to torment. 

Unfortunately that day, the assholes decided to turn their attention towards me. “Hey, big tiddie Yuri” one of them whispered towards me. I tried to do my best to ignore them and not let the hurt show. There’s a group of guys in my class that love to make disgusting comments about me. I understand that my “posture” brings me attention from guys, but they don’t have to make me uncomfortable about it. These comments really bug me, sometimes even more than the “creepy” comments I get. I feel so disgusted when guys talk about me this way, reducing me to nothing but my body, like I’m not even a person. “Hey, you may be scary, but those tits aren’t” another one whispers. I hate this. I feel so overwhelmed right now. I can’t handle the stress of this today. I just wanna go home. I hear them laughing at me. I don’t want to deal with this today. I just wanna go home and escape into my books. I can feel the urge to hurt myself. The pressure is building up. I can’t take it anymore, I need to get out of here. Suddenly one reaches out and whispers something horrible in my ear, and I snap.

MC:  
I don’t have any friends in computer lab, so I always just sit in the back of the classroom. Today was a Friday, so I decided just to put my headphones in and zone out. We barely had any work to do, so I just was basically half asleep at this point, listening to some nice music and just hoping the bell would ring, letting me finally get my freedom for the weekend. Sayori and Nat wanted to play minecraft when they get out of club tonight, so I was gonna stop by a convenience store and pick up some chips and candy. Peace out at my home tonight, and then spend Saturday freaking out about the party. A party with the Monika? The coolest girl in school! She wants me at her party? Ok not really, I’m only going cause of my friendship with Sayori and Natsuki, but that can change when I get in. Maybe I can make a connection with her tomorrow night, and maybe who knows where we can go from there…..

My idle fantasizing is broken up by a loud crash in the front of the room. I glance over, and look in shock. The quiet one, Yuri, suddenly freaked out. She jumped out of her chair so fast it knocked it over. “LEAVE ME ALONE” she yelled. At the moment I realized I’ve never heard her voice before. It was more scary sounding than I thought it would be. I looked back and she had tears in her eyes. “LEAVE ME ALONE SHE SAID” and ran out of class, before the teacher had a chance to do anything. The class was stunned into silence for a few moments, before breaking out into laughter. “What a weirdo” someone yelled. I wanted to laugh, but I just felt bad. For some reason I couldn’t understand, I was overtaken with a deep sadness. I just felt bad for her. She may be a creep or whatever, but I was shaken by what I saw. For some reason I couldn’t understand, I felt compelled to go look for her. I’ve never been the type to care so much about these things, yet suddenly I felt motivated to go help her. It wasn’t right to see her upset like that.

Yuri:  
I sit on the toilet seat, having just finished my favourite coping method. I sit there for a minute, reflecting on what happened. I completely lost my cool. My god, if they didn’t hate me before, then they do now. I’ve been humiliated in front of my entire class. They are probably laughing at me right now. I’m so humiliated I can’t believe it. How will I ever go back to school after this. No wonder everyone hates me. They hated me before but they know I’m a real freak now. After bandaging up my arms, I try to figure out my next move. I can’t go back to class after this. It’s all too much. I’ll call my Mom. She worries about me a lot, and this will only make it worse. I head to the office, and try to hide my tears. I can only hope it doesn’t look like I’ve been crying too much. I’m good enough at my little game to avoid any blood staining my clothes, so I don’t have to worry about that, but I still have to worry about my tears. My makeup is messed up, and the office lady looks at me weird when I tell her I have to go home. I sit in the office and wait for my Mom to arrive, just hoping I don’t see classmates. The last thing I want to see is anyone from my class. I feel so humiliated over what happened. All of a sudden my worst nightmare occurs. Some dorky kid from my class bursts into the office. I pray to myself that he isn’t there for some other reason. I hope he isn’t looking for me. I hope he didn’t come to force me to come back, to complete my humiliation. Oh no, he’s sitting beside me. “Hey Yuri, a-are you o-ok?” he stutters at me. Oh great, he’s scared of me. My god Yuri, you're such an embarrassment. 

MC:  
After bolting out of class, I found myself standing in the hallways, looking confused. Once I got out, I realized that I had no idea where she could have gone. My legs seemed to drag me out of class, but now I was out, they suddenly turned to cement. What am I doing. I don’t even know this girl. She’s the school's designated outcast. Everyone is either afraid of her, or laughs at her. Why would I want to even be associated with that loser. Yet for some reason, I couldn’t let her go. I need to find her. Now I just need to find her.

I’m not actually sure why someone like Yuri would go. I check the library, she loves books, so maybe she could be there. When she isn’t there, I head downstairs. Maybe she’s already left school. I’d hope not, I feel like someone needs to speak to her and let her know she’s gonna be ok. As I head towards the door, hoping I can catch up, I notice a tall purple figure sitting in the office. There is Yuri. I glance at her. She’s curled up in her chair, her long hair covering her eyes. She looks like a wounded animal. I can’t help but feel an urge to protect her. Once I approach her, I realize I’m not sure what to say. I’ve never spoken to Yuri in my life. I’m not sure what to say. She looks up at me, with tears in her eyes, looking so fragile my heart breaks. I awkwardly stammer at her if she’s ok, and she just recoils at me. Wow, I’m such an idiot. What am I doing? I’m probably just making her feel worse. I wish I knew what to say to help her. 

“T-those guys are such jerks. I’ve always hated them.” She remains silent. Oh god, what can I do. Yuri starts tearing up again. “W-why are you here? Did the teacher send you?” “No, I wanna make sure you're ok” She looks at me with a hurt look. “Why are you being nice to me? I’m a freak. I’m the school freak.” “Y-Yuri, don’t talk about yourself like that. You seem like a cool person. I don’t believe the rumours about you.” I’m trying desperately to calm her down but it is not working. She’s in tears now. I’ve definitely screwed this up. I should have just left her alone. 

Then suddenly, Yuri does something I would never have expected. She awkwardly reaches out and hugs me. I never expected to feel her against me like this. She’s surprisingly warm, and smells amazing. I try to put those thoughts aside and focus on the crying girl in my arms. She’s shaking and whimpering in my ear. “It’s gonna be ok I whisper, it’s gonna be ok.” I never thought I’d do this for Yuri, yet I knew I made the right choice. I don’t know why, but I wanna do my best to help this scared girl. I wanna help the schools outcast learn to love herself. I’ve always been a normal guy, who’s kept to himself, but now I care about someone else. I wanna help this girl.

End Chapter One.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> MC and Yuri reflect on the events of that afternoon, and both deal with complicated feelings.

Yuri:  
I don’t know why this boy was so nice to me. He’s never spoken to me before, never given me any attention, probably laughed at the jokes about me, and yet he seemed to care about me. I’m smart enough to question his intentions, and yet I couldn’t help but savor that moment. When I was in his arms I felt so safe, like nothing could hurt me. I’m going to have to be very smart now, because I know with my obsessive personality, I’ll scare him away and do something much worse to myself. I’ve never had any experience with anything like this. It’s been years since I had a true friend, and I’ve never had anyone, other than my parents when I was young, hold me the way he did. Eventually he left, went back to class to inform the class I'm not feeling well and would be going home.

“H-hey can you do me a favour?” I asked nervously. “I’m in the literature club. We meet after school in room 3-1. Could you go up after school and tell them I felt sick and went home?” “Sure, I know a few people in that club. They will understand.” I felt weirdly warm inside. Something about this boy felt so comforting. School was a place of fear, of anxiety, a place where I wanted to scream, and wanted to hide. A place where I spent the whole day trying to repress my worst urges. And yet, in this moment, I felt completely safe, safe enough to ask an incredibly embarrassing question, one if I was in a more normal state of mind, would never ask. “C-could w-we trade phone numbers? I w-wanna make sure the club is o-ok with me missing it.” “Uhh sure,” he responded “I’ll send ya a text after I talk to them.” “G-great.” I’m still too nervous to talk normally around him, or look him in the eye, and yet his presence still relaxed me. “I’m gonna head back now, I should probably let everyone know your alright. See ya Monday” As he walked off, I suddenly felt feelings I have never felt before in my life. 

MC:   
Well now I’ve done it. After spending my first three years of high school avoiding becoming an outsider, I very publicly went off to console the biggest weirdo in my school. I assume they are laughing at me right now. Probably a thousand new rumours have started about the nature of our relationship. I don’t even have a relationship with Yuri, we never spoke before today! 

Despite this, I feel strangely proud about what I did. To see that girl light up, and even smile through her nervousness made me feel really happy. Do I like Yuri? I have no idea. I don’t think I like any girls romantically at our school. Like obviously I think some are cute, Monika being my (and everyone else's) number one, but I never thought about relationships with anyone here. Most girls don’t talk to me, and the idea of dating Sayori or Natsuki seems weird, like I’m too close to them to ever see them as more than friends. Despite my urge to comfort her today, I could still never imagine dating someone like Yuri. I don’t know how I’d ever be able to relate to someone like that, or how I’d ever get her to open up. 

As I return to class, all the eyes are on me. “Yuri isn’t feeling well,” I tell the teacher. “Her Mom is on her way to pick her up.” I hear some giggles and whispers as I return to my seat, and boredly kill time for the last half hour before the bell. I can’t wait to go home, have some snacks and just relax after a long day, but first I gotta go inform the club that Yuri won’t be coming. I find the room rather easily, and gently knock, and suddenly, the person that I’ve thought a lot about yet never spoken to opens it up. When I went to visit the club, I assumed I’d be informing Sayori or Natsuki, girls that are easy for me to talk to. For some reason, it slipped my mind that Monika would be there. As she stepped towards me, I made two huge realizations. One: Monika is even prettier up close. Two: Monika smells lovely. Trying to keep so many thoughts at bay, I told myself I’ll have to get out of this quickly if I wanna keep it together. “Hi, I’m Monika, and this is the literature club! Are you here to learn more about us?” “No I uhh just wanted to drop by and let you guys know that Yuri won’t be able to come today.” “Aww that’s a shame”, Monika said dejectedly, “even if she’s quiet, it’s a lot more fun with her around.” “Is that MC’s voice?” I heard Sayori yell excitedly. Then a more angry sounding voice “JOIN THE LITERATURE CLUB YOU DUMB BITCH”. “Oh I guess you know these two already,” Monika said. “Why don’t you join us for our meeting.” “Uhh sure,” I said, realizing how hard it is to say no to Monika. “OMG YES YES YES” yelled Sayori, and I could hear Natsuki’s laugh in the background. I guess I’ll join the club. My two best friends are already in it. And Yuri. That does make things weirder. I had stopped thinking about her for a second, but then I remembered my complicated feelings from earlier. I still can’t figure out why I felt a need to go after her earlier, and comfort her. Why do I feel so protective of this girl? I have no idea. Deciding not to continue to overthink these feelings, I’ll just send her a text to confirm that the club knows she isn’t coming, and that I’ve decided to join for a few meetings. 

Yuri:  
Oh my god, he’s joining the club. This must mean something. Calm down, calm down Yuri. You are already overthinking everything. Don’t forget, you’ve always had an obsessive personality. You always get so obsessed with people. This is why people think you are creepy. Cause you so bad with people. If someone is even slightly nice to me, I become obsessed. I need to calm down. I have my ways of calming down. I’ll just walk to a washroom for a minute, look over my knife collection, and relax. Once I’ve calmed myself down, I had to reflect on today's events. I freaked out in class. I cried in the school office. A guy from my class came to check on me. I hugged him. He told me he is gonna join the same club I’m in. And now I’m lying in bed, staring at the ceiling thinking about him. I’ve never thought I was the type of person who deserves love. I could never see myself finding a boyfriend, even if I wanted one. And now…...calm down Yuri. He just showed you basic kindness. It’s not like he proposed to you or something. The last thing you wanna do is make him uncomfortable and scare him off. Like you do with everyone.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading my first ever story! I've long been a fan of other writers on this site, and with nothing to do cause of quarantine, I decided to take the plunge and try my hand at writing something. I feel like there's a lack of Yuri-centric content, so I wanted to try my hand and write some. If you liked this, and want to see another chapter, please leave a comment. I would really appreciate it! I wouldn't mind constructive criticism either, cause like, this is my first ever story. Anyway, thanks for reading, and I'll hopefully post chapter two soon.


End file.
